Made in Japan

Yesterday was an interesting day. And as I sit here still in a quasi-drunken state at 8AM unable to sleep, I figured I'd document it.

Japanese people being fucked up was one of the themes of yesterday. I don't even need to make any examples. They have the strangest fetishes of any group of people ever. I don't feel like explaining it to those who don't dig around in the darker corners of the internet.

So, first of all, this is the first weekend of the Daytona Race Weeks. "Sounds cool" says you. "Fucking blows" says me. There are so many fuck people here it's horrible. I was driving home yesterday being all about going to walmart to liberate myself some strawberry-banana orange juice, as well as other edibles. But when I turn onto the road there's a problem. The left turn lane to go into the walmart is backed up all the way to the next stoplight behind it. Promptly saying "screw this" I had to get across to the other lane for straight people. (Not straight like not gay, more like going straight at the light.) Of course there's 8.5x10^20 rednecks in the way. But I made it.

And then we decided to go play some pool, because that's what we do when we're bored. And by we I mean either Ashley or Dave and I. Dave was at work cause he's a hoser, so Ashley and I went. First we tried to go to Uncle Waldo's, cause the people there tend to smell less like urine and want to kill you less often. Well, we get there, and the entire parking lot, THE ENTIRE PARKING LOT, is full of fucking 4x4 trucks with NASCAR stickers fucking wallpapered all over them. So, upon uttering the phrase of the day, "screw this", we did a chandelle and headed north on Nova to go to Brown's. Brown's being the place where the people more often than not do smell like urine, and usually do want you to die. Well, we get there and the strangest thing happened. There was nobody there. It was a nice surprise, observe:



So we stayed there for about an hour and a half playing pool, watching Jimmy Neutron, and smelling like smoke. So, after 1.5 hours and $10 it was time to go home and be a lazy piece of crap until I found something to do for the night.

Alas, after not being home for long Michelle had gotten out of work early so she invited the three of us over to her house for drinking.

Tangent:
Ladies and gentlemen, word of advice, if somehow you can manage it, do not turn 21. It will make you so much more poor than you already are. I thought I was poor before, but now, geez. I know it's bad because I don't even have to rationalize the purchase when I make it. The money just flows out of my bank account and I have no regrets whatsoever. And this is coming from a guy who wont buy a new 3 dollar toothbrush because he'd rather wait for the next time he goes to the dentist. So let that be a warning to you.

Reverse tangent:
So I ended up going to walgreens and buying a half-gallon of Bacardi Lemon. A drink I had promised myself I would never do again. But I did it. So, I did like we used to do back in the woods in NH and proceeded to do a chug bacardi then chug the Dole juice. needless to say within about 45 minutes of actual drinking time I was off to the races. I kind of remember watching Bandits again (BEAVERS AND DUCKS), but don't quite remember the end.



Yeah, so I guess it was bandits. That wall was pretty hott, imo.

I've got a few more pictures...



Michelle probably saying what turned out to be her theme phrase for the night, "don't fucking break anything you drunk pieces of shit."



Ashley listening to Michelle and agreeing to try not to break anything.



And last but not least, me momentarily passed out on the couch. I would later sleep on the floor. I need to stop sleeping on floors, it's doing a number on my back.


I've got nothin'. There's nothing new in the store as of right now. I'll probably work on a shirt or two today, so check it out later tonight.